My name is Alex, I'm 43 days old, and I was born in Preston, Texas. My Parents, Tracy Milf, and Forest Gimp, ended up buying a farm after their life story blew up in the movie "Lemon Whore's",  However they weren't really happy having me, at first they hit me with a cow prod to shut me up, but they got bored so they had me live 1.83 miles outside the farm in a small 8×14 shack with no light entering and a metal bucket that I had to eat, and secrete in.  To be honest it wasn't so bad the first 6 years, however they bought a dog and forgot about me.  Food went from a sandwich made from lawn clippings and leftover pie crust, to a single piece of a onion ring once a week, now you may be thinking, how did I survive?  Well one day a group of teenagers (turtles?) ended up burning the farm when one of them dropped their flamethrower dildo in the hay.  My Non-Binary gender fluid Pansexual father was furious and went after them, they headed towards my shack in an attempt to hide (Surprising they ran 4 miles).  They broke the lock and found me "choking the chicken" to a dirt drawing I made of a circle.  They ran out and I saw the moon for the first time then I saw my father running towards them, I hid behind the shack and waited for him to be far away enough that he wouldn't see me run, I didn't really know how to run since my legs were brittle and short but I managed to make it to the main road that led to the farm and saw a car headed my way and it almost hit me, it was a cop that just so happened to drive by,  He took me to the hospital where they nourished me back to a state where I could run, write, and speak in tongues.  Then they filed this and a court case was started, my parents tried to deny that they treated me badly to no avail.  I won the case and was given 12 dollars and 44 cents in compensation.  The case was done and family who was looking for a child called my "lawyer" and a meeting was arranged.  They were such nice people and caring, when they adopted me they drove all the way to where I live now, in El Paso, where they put me in a shitty fucking school, a ghetto fucking neighborhood, and their actual kids are trash that let maggots grow on food they leave the floor.  I started this channel and website as a means of making bank and moving out of that place and buy my dog some timbs (no not "dawg" as in friend I mean literal dog like the animal).  I hope I get big on YouTube to grow as a person and meet new people.  Thank you for those who will stick by me and to those other craigslist offerer's that will eventually find me.  I'm Alex and thank you.